Kevin Federline is a fat turd and when I say fat I mean FAT

So I have started watching Celebrity Fat Club today, and first of all I have a real problem with the name of this show. The cast of fat turds includes some old dude from skid row, some fat chick from High School Musical, Some fat gay bastard from Project Runway or something like that, Tanisha the big fat whale from Bad Girls Club, Bobby 'I'm not so skinny since I stopped smoking crack' Brown, some chunker butt from Baywatch, Kevin 'fatass' Federline and his ex wife Char Jackson. So 'celebrity' is basically a lie. "Fat washed up D list celebrities that got really fat" or "I was a loser and now I'm still a loser but also a big fat turd look at me" would be more realistic. So now that we have gotten that out of the way let's just jump right into K-Feds enormous ass. I have hated Kevin Federline for as long as I have known he was alive. So I didn't think that this would be any different, however when he introduced himself as Kevin "fatass" Federline, a scary thought flashed through my mind.....he may win me over at some point. If K-fat somehow turns everything he touches into garbage. Exhibit A: Char Jackson...they posted a picture of her on the show from back in the day...and she was one hot piece of ass......then K-fat happened. Exhibit B: Brittany Spears.....I don't even have to elaborate he literally made her into the queen of trailer trash. Can someone tell me how his retarded sperm is actually capable of impregnating everything it touches. It seems like the sperm would just drooling and swimming in a circle confused, but how is somehow finding its way to and fertalizing eggs is evolution beyond my understanding. Also can I just point out to Kevin and Brittany that two wrongs generally don't make a right...and while a small miracle could occur and one of your children might end up normal.......I wouldn't count on it (it's okay, I doubt either one of you can actually count anyways so forget I mentioned it). So heres to K-fed (that fat lazy bastard) and his retarded but determined sperm winning me over.